Weekly Roundup

MILD WEATHER - Today, the weather soared to 61 degrees F. So, after blogging at Panera, I put on some old clothes and took the opportunity to get some much needed yard work in. FOUR HOURS later, my yard was in tip top shape! INTERNAL AUDITING - I've been asked to do some internal auditing work, at work. It's where I look at processes and try to determine whether the processes are 'in control.' I then document my findings and find ways of fixing the broken processes. It's tedious and very time consuming. Even so, I don't mind writing and it's kinda nice knowing it's getting done. Guess I'm a masochist. NEW EATING & EXERCISE PLAN - On Monday, I start back on my eating plan. Low calorie/fat, shakes, SlimFast, small portions, etc. Mix that with DAILY exercise and I should be on track for losing 13 lbs in 2 months. The biggest barrier to this is, of course going out. I love beer and I'll really have to watch it!

Palestinian Election

Listening to NPR this morning, I learned that there is a growing concern on the part of the US, Israel and other Mid East countries due to the Palestine’s “Hummus” party gaining power, after their victory in this week’s popular elections. Personally, I like hummus. I live to serve it with flat bread. It’s great at parties and, with its protein, is a logical healthy choice!

Basta!

I woke up this morning well rested, in good spirits and thought “Basta!” (Enough!) Enough feeling bad! Enough negativity! Enough being a drain on friends! It’s not worth my time! The housekeeper is not worth my time! There are ones that clean better, without the lip and sass! I have an opportunity to funnel this energy into something more productive, such as concentrating on my health/fitness (being all muscular and sexy for spring.) Or working on my various projects and interests! It’s a question of rethinking priorities and how I spend my time. (Ex. Spending the time that I used to chating online--on my projects or working out, taking a walk, etc.) The only real barrier to all of the above is my wrists, which are beginning to act up again. (Early signs of carpal tunnel.)

These are a few of my favorite things...

My damned, good for nothing wrists. My friend Dale potentially being sent to Iraq this week. My step mom, child piano prodigy, forgetting the piano after 60+ years. My achy breaky heart. (Billy Ray Cyrus, eat your heart out.) My president, trophy wife, and their "Abstinence Program" VERSUS the climbing rate of infection of HIV/AIDS among young people in the US.

Pad Thai

I had such an easy, great meal! Ever tried "A Taste of Thai" Pad Thai mix (by Andre Prost, Inc.?) Follow the directions, but add another egg, 2 carrots and 2-5 tablespoons of Vietnamese "Sriracha HOT chili sauce" (depending on your taste buds) at the very end, with the sprouts. Yum yum.

Online Photography Exhibition: Dedication to Leslie Vant (1911-2005)

SO WHO WAS LES VANT? My grandfather Vant was an amazing guy and lived a full 94 years. Early in life, while working for Ratheon, in Boston, he helped testing the technology that led to the modern microwave oven. Along with two children, he had three grandchildren and a great grandchild. While strict with his children and grandchildren, he was fiercely proud and encouraging. From photography to music to technology, he insisted that I be my very best. My favorite times with him were in his home office. He, working his aerial photography business on his wooden desk, me at the computer desk "working" at the computer. For years and years I sat at the keyboard of a succession of Commodore computers, which he continually upgraded, for my sake. Thus began my interest in computers and led to my current profession. He loved speaking French with me, which led to my passion for language and cultures of the world. Throughout his life, he was active in his Church. He sang for decades in the choir. He volunteered his time to aid in videotaping sermons at the Old South United Methodist Church. For a decade or more, he also sing for small services at various nursing homes. In October 2005, he died quite suddenly of heart failure.

My Balls

Glenn: The Biggest Loser at Gayme Night

Scot, Glenn and Paul came by tonight for gayme night, which consisted of Uno and Cranium. Although Cranium is challenging, the rules are a bit retarded. But I don't recall ever playing the came sober. So, unbeknownst to me, there was a crash outside. Glenn and Scot heard it, but we continued playing. A few minutes later, Scot went outside to smoke. As he got to the porch, he realized that there were people outside my door; they explained to him that there was an accident. As it turns out, an intoxicated middle aged woman in a Landrover hit a car up the street then swerved onto the grassy area between my sidewalk and the street. She smashed into the back of Glenn's vehicle, spraying glass everywhere and moving his vehicle 15 feet. She backed up and drove off, leaving the scene of the crime. Later on, the police officer, Officer Watson, referred to people that drink at the local bars in Cheviot as "Knuckleheads" (harsh language.) By 3:30 am, I was in bed.

On Brokeback Mountain (Revisited)

So, being such a big fan of the movie, I went and saw Bareback Mountain a second time this afternoon. I chose the earliest (i.e. least crowded) and I went alone. This time, I didn't compare the book to the movie, I just took it in, enjoying the comfy seats and stadium seating. Since I was alone, I allowed myself emotion, which I could hide, in my anonymity. I realized a lot of subtle details and it was apparent how much blank airtime there was. Periods of nothingness, which mirrored the large open spaces (of Canada, where it was filmed.) The simple, rugged scenery contrasted the unspoken tenderness between the two men. Gays haven't had a film like this before, where gays are treated like people, not marginalized. Sure, there are love stories out there, but this one was for us. We are capable of loving deeply. And, you know what? A lot of times our situations are less than ideal. And I think it's fair for people to have a good example of this. OK. I don't want to overstate the importance of the film. But, it is very telling that the film is being watched by people/getting attention from people of all sexual orientations. I encourage it! It's beautiful and worthy! And I love people with open minds!

Hot Dog Soup Recipe

Growing up, my mother used to make "hot dog soup," a simple comfort food, which warmed me many cold nights in Massachusetts. After a bit of effort, I found the recipe and I'm going to try it on the boys tomorrow night, at "gayme" night: Ingredients 1 lb hot dogs 1 lb cabbage 1 onion 1 lrg potato 2 x carrots 4 x beef bouillon cubes Black pepper Parsley Instructions Chop cabbage into 2" pieces, dice onion, peel and cube potato into 1/4" pieces. Cut carrots into 1/4" discs. Add black pepper and parsley to taste. Put all ingredients into pot and cover with water. Add bouillon. Cook until cabbage and carrots are tender. Cut hot dogs into "pennies" and add to mixture. Cook until hot dogs are heated.

Weekly Roundup

BEING KNOWN – I was sitting at Hamburger Mary’s and John, a guy who I had had a drink with last Fall said, “I saw your name on the (online) playbill for Chess. Congrats! I didn’t know you sang.” In another situation, another person online recognized me from an AVOC event. I guess it’s good to circulate and get out of the house! DO I KNOW YOU? – As much time as you spend with friends, you’d think you know them. Even close friends have secrets... Well, to be fair, I don’t think I know myself! LOVE SICK – Yep. It’s still painful. My mind knows to let go, but, alas, you can’t rationalize with your heart; it won’t listen. This has been a tough week. (Although I try to be very proactive and positive in this blog, I’ve been told before that I need to also express the not-so-great things, if nothing more than to put in a place holder to show my mental state. This situation continues to be pretty rough. Time…) LIVE & LEARN - I should have known that moving in with an ex was a bad idea. It's not his fault, it's mine. But, I'm not going to beat myself up over this. LIGHTEN UP! XAVIER – There is a big local rivalry between “UC” (The University of Convicts) and Xavier University, (My alma mater, for my MBA.) Luckily, the better team won out in overtime! GO MUSKIES!

Company Diversity Story: Friendship

One of my friends/ex coworkers in Argentina asked me if he could submit the following story to a diversity contest: My name is Andrés Vellano. I have been working with the company for 13 years and since 1998, I have worked in the LA BIS Organization. I participated in almost every implementation of the different systems that show the sales of the Company, systems that are used by the internal users to analyze our business. Working in this regional job, I have had the chance to travel to many countries inside and outside of Latin America and I have also had the possibility to have many bosses, female and male. There was an interesting situation with one of these bosses that enriched my self a lot professionally and also personally. One day we were finishing a videoconference and my boss said that he had to go. So I asked him where he had to go and he answered that he had to go because his girlfriend was waiting for him. In order to give a little more context, he spoke only English, he lived in a Spanish speaking country and he started learning Spanish. I studied English in the primary school until I was 12 and also studied English in the classes that the company gives to employees. My English skills were fine talking about work but they were a little weak when talking about daily life. A couple of days after that videoconference my boss called me by phone. After talking about job stuff, he said that he wanted to tell me something. So he explained me that he felt bad after the videoconference because he told me a specific lie. I did not understand, so he said that actually he wasn’t going to meet his girlfriend, but that he had to meet his boyfriend at their home. Because of several reasons I thought that he was telling me a joke (Language, informal relation that we had, etc.). But after a couple of minutes I realized that he was telling me something serious and in fact his significant other was not a woman but a man. I grew up in a family, where among other values, the respect for others, was one of the most important one. So, naturally, do you know what was my first feeling / reaction ? Pride and Gratefulness. I felt pride because besides his local boss, I was the first person to know about his personal situation. Taking into account that we had never met in person, that made feel really proud. I felt gratefulness because the fact that he had so large gesture of trust, trust that perhaps he did not have even with the people of his team in the same country where he worked. He made me feel, I don’t know how to describe it. He basically made me feel more like a human being. I don’t want to make this story much longer, so let me tell you that the relationship between boss – employee was very good and we generated an environment of total motivation and understanding. We think that we are all people and people in long term relationships have similar wants, desires and fears. It doesn’t matter whether it’s man/woman or man/man. In general, at work, if you open yourself and get to know each other you get better results, enjoy the work more and make friends. I also want to highlight some things that I learnt throughout this experience like the company behaviors in this kind of situations. I gladly surprise when knowing that my company treats the relations between women – women and men – men in the same way and with the same benefits they treat / give men – women. The boyfriend of my boss was entitled to company Medical benefits. As my boss was an expatriate, he had the chance to travel to his country periodically, as did his boyfriend. I know that I wouldn’t have to be surprised but in a “macho” society, like the Argentinean one, I can assure that many companies do not act as P&G acts in these cases. Even today and never having never seen him face to face, we are in touch, this time not for talking about work, but for things related with the family and life in general. I am deeply gratefulness to have the opportunity to meet my former boss who really cares about others. The winning entry was about a woman from another country who added diversity to the organization, which was a sham! Still, I was glad Andrés put in the effort!

Yearly Roundup

* 2005 * "How do you measure? Measure a year..?" GROWTH - From fine tuning my project management skills at work, to new hobbies (photography and musical theatre,) I grew! NEW WARDROBE, NEW HOUSE - Over the year, I learned how to be more stylish. With a smaller figure and after selling a lot of clothes in a yard sale, it was time to update my wardrobe! After my house renovations, I got on a path to a prettier, nicer house. SHAPE & HEALTH - I lost 20 pounds and gained 10 back. At one point, I had met my health goals! But then came concern with my health, with my failing wrists. BETTER GOOD - I had some very rewarding times volunteering, meeting new people and helping my community. FRIENDS - I was fortunate to have had a lot of quality time with friends. LOVE - While measured in months, I was in love. Meaningful love. And I love love. TRAVEL - I was fortunate to have been able to pursue one of my passions: international travel. I spent fully one month of the year abroad.

On Brokeback Mountain

So, on the heat deprived, slow, train from Zamosc to Krakow, I listened to Brokeback mountain on Audiobook, while watching the snowy rural landscape pass by. Although simply written, I was moved. Straight or otherwise, this is the story of love between two truly connected people. Neither individual truly understood their feelings. Ennis felt the intensity of the love just several minutes after he said goodbye to his closer-than-close friend. "Within a mile Ennis felt like someone was pulling his guts out hand over hand a yard at a time. He stopped at the side of the road and, in the whirling new snow, tried to puke but nothing came up. He felt about as bad as he ever had and it took a long time for the feeling to wear off." The sad part is that Ennis never told his love for Jack; he was reluctant to act on it. He was too afraid of the consequences, too afraid of losing his family and being persecuted/beat up. And at the end, he ended up alone with pleasant dreams of Jack, with Jack's words "we could have had a good life together" ringing in his head. The movie was a good adaptation, but left the characters a bit more hollow than those my mind's eye had created after reading the book. Even so, this is one of the most important films in a long time.

Top 10 Stress Relief Strategies

Even today, my stomach has still been in knots off and on. Here are some devices I've used in the last week to cope with my current situation: 10. Clean your house 9. Take a bubble bath 8. Watch a funny movie 7. Get drunk 6. Take a nap 5. Talk with friends 4. Take a walk 3. Yell! ("AAAHHHH!") 2. Cry 1. Take deep, deep breaths and think positive thoughts

Night Adventures

Although I am on the rebound, I am not dead and I believe you shouldn't sulk around the house! I need to do things that make me happy and to do things to help me move on with life! TESTING AT SHOOTERS I had volunteered earlier in the week to help with a new program to aid with 20 minute "quick tests" within the bar. My role was to go around, flirt a bit and in a playful way, encouraged people to take safe sex kits and sign up for the testing. We had tested around 8 people, but then we decided to end the testing, as the Shooters staff was walking in on the private testing. (That doesn't work.) FROLICKING AT ADONIS So, at 11:00 pm, I drove off to the East side, to the highly acclaimed Adonis bar. It's a new gay night club that's on the river, approximately 15-20 minutes from downtown (in the wrong direction, a 30-40 minute drive from my house.) I arrived and found Brian and Eric. Paul and Scot soon arrived. We talked and I got a tour of the place from Brian and Eric. We had a few rounds of beer. Walked around people watching, etc. The crowd was interesting. Suddenly, a rather plump, blond woman was flirting on Brian and me. At one point she asked me to sit on a couch. Hmm, ok. She got on my lap and asked whether I liked men or women. I told her and she pouted a bit and asked, "well, will you just French kiss me for a while?" I turned away and I said no. She touched my jeans and I moved to get up. Then some more beer. Fortunately, I was able to crash at Brian and Eric's.

Normalcy

After 4 weeks of being away from the status quo (from both traveling abroad to issues on the home front,) it feels good to RETURN to the status quo. For example, I'm looking forward to going to the grocery store and to paying bills. Since, it's a long weekend, I'm going to start working on my new bedroom. Although this year didn't begin the way I wanted (did last year?) I'm confident this is going to be my year!

Weekly Roundup

BROKEN HEART/UNRECIPROCATED LOVE - I have a rule to not talk about dating on my blog. But I'll share this: I had fallen in love with the house cleaner. And while I was away, he got involved with someone else. Long story short, let's just say I'm cleaning my own damn kitchen from now on. LITTLE SHINY BALL - The origami ball had holes and, like it or not, wouldn't have made it to shore. Fortunately, a ship came by and a boatman plucked it out of the cold waters, bringing it to safety. Still, the paper is wet and the ball a bit out of shape. It will take a while to dry.

My Emotions: The Story of the Shiny Little Ball

Take the mismatched, jetlagged and tired form that is the shiny little ball: Now envision the shiny little ball being pelted off the side of the Brent Spence bridge. It will toss & turn in the coppy, icy waters of the Ohio. It will take some time but I’m confident it will eventually reach the safety of the shore. When it does, the shiny little ball will be better and stronger than it was before.

2006: Looking Ahead

Better - Be even more effective at work; - Be a better friends: listen twice, speak once - Be a better uncle - Be a better neighbor (more time on outdoor stuff) - Be better to my community (more activism and more volunteerism) - Have a better half Brighter - Get my Project Management certification - Learn to speak decent Polish - Speak more French & German More Artistic - Post 4-5 online photographic expositions - Sing and dance (not just in musicals, in general!) - Let my house be an artistic expression - Make artwork for my house