Mr Patterson: A Secret Agent?

Recently, I have noticed some behaviors in Mr. Patterson that make me believe that he is a secret agent under deep, deep cover. Why? - He can and does open every door in the house. This allows him easy access for quickly hiding. It also allows him to inspect the contents of the room to ensure things have not been moved. - He can hide in extremely small secret places. While there, he is listening, observing, making mental notes. - Conveniently, he always is in black. - He does the majority of work at night, when you hear him making passes of the house, doing surveillance and collecting data. With his keen sense of smell, sight and hearing, Secret Agent Patterson is very useful to a nation. The question is: for which nation is he an agent?

Waiting

My life is all about waiting, and being patient. I'm now waiting again to see my love. Jason returned to Phoenix, which really, really sucks. I miss the bugger already. But I do have two other fans waiting for me to get in bed.

Why does Matt's place look so "clean.." so.. "unlived in..?"

So, why does Matt's kitchen look so "clean.." so.. "unlived in?" A. Matt now works as a Bean-Counter, with Chase, and he never sees the light of day, much less the inside of his apartment. B. Matt's new Morman wife is going to CLEAN, CLEAN, CLEAN, per the bible. Leviticus 18:19 C. Matt is preparing for his move. D. Matt hired a manservant. E. C and D but not A and B. F. A and D, sometimes B.

Weekly Roundup

JASON IN TOWN – Jason is in Cincinnati for the long weekend. We're having a very nice visit as you can read from his blog. BLACK FRIDAY – We did 6+ hours of shopping yesterday and took advantage of many of the Friday after Thanksgiving sales, including some memory sticks (1 GB for just $15) and some inexpensive DVDs, including two of my favorite TV series: My name is Earl and Arrested Development. CURRENT HOUSE – Yay! The construction of my current house is nearly complete partially due to my hard work but mostly due to the fact that I hired much of the upstairs repairs/painting to an outside contractor. This has been exceptionally stressful for me. I've been under the gun as I plan on putting the house on the market next week. Anybody wanting a pretty house on Cincinnati's West Side? TOWNHOUSE – I'm in the process of buying a new townhouse in Cincinnati's most prominent Gaybourhoods. The new construction is a pretty 3 story dwelling and is just 2 miles from work. Tomorrow, with Jason, we will make the final selections for paint, carpet, etc. Yay! NEW CAT IN TOWN – Chase, Jason's cat, is now living with me. So I've gone from zero cats in September to two now. But both cats are very affectionate and cute. They are adjusting very very well to one another.

Thanksgiving 2006

I enjoyed one of the most laid back and nice Thanksgivings in recent memory. Jason flew into town for the event and we were joined by Andrew, Troy, Scot, Rich and Paul. (Paul is absent from the picture above as he left early.) The food was succulent. Rich and Andrew prepared the turkey. The best part of the event was the company. The mood was festive, relaxed and fun. Scot did a jiggy dance which we all enjoyed. Sometimes, you have to sit back and count your blessings. I am thankful to have such great friends. I thought the event had a certain amount of class and sophistication (especially after Paul left.) I just bought a new table and chair set from Cost Plus World Market, which I think looked rather attractive.

"Indiana Shower:" Etymology/Word Origins

So, your girlfriend is all on your ass because you haven't showered in days. While you don't have to shower for watching NASCAR with your buddies, your bitch girlfriend just won't shut up until you do. You have no water in your trailer because you spent the rest of your paycheck buying Kentucky Good Times bourbon. So you hook a water hose to your neighbor's trailer and feed the other end through the window, being careful to not spill your plastic jug of bourbon that's sitting on the back of the toilet. 10 minutes later, you're brand spankin' clean. Your wife ain't a fussin' and you're feelin' purdy good. Note: Because of the construction happening in my bathroom upstairs, I'm forced to have an Indiana shower.

Sunday Painting

It's going to be a late night. I'm not going to sleep until the downstairs is cleaned (after having prepped and painted several days...)

Herzschmerzen

It's a new week and I'm excited that I get to see my man this week. I miss him so much.

Weekly Roundup

EYE – Another reason why I outsource house maintenance work is that I'm an accident waiting to happen. To be fair, I don't think I've ever gotten paint on my face. On Tuesday, I didn't get paint on my face, per se. Rather, a health glob landed in my eye. After 15 minutes of flushing it out, I went to urgent care, where I was told there was no damage, fortunately. RIVALRY – The town is ablaze with talk of football… Ohio and Michigan will be at a complete standstill this afternoon with the Ohio State versus Michigan football game. While I don't know the teams—at all—I may find a place to watch the game. It's fun to sit back and watch hot guys get all frustrated and bothered by a leather orb being thrown back and forth. BLOODY VOMIT – I came home to a rather pleasant surprise yesterday. The cat had vomited blood. Even better, the partially dried vomit had a segment of ringworm in it. Yay! I whisked the cat off to the vet, in Indiana. $66 later and three prescriptions, I think Mr. P will be ok. Frankly, I was kind of surprised he didn't have worms, being that he had lived outside as a stray. PAJAMA GAME – Cincinnati Conservatory of Music, one of the better music schools in the country, sponsors a fair amount of performances for the community. Earlier in the week, they opened with "The Pajama Game." Having recently seen several shows on Broadway, I was really taken back at the quality of the show. I especially liked the gymnasts and choreography. The singing was top notch.

Under Construction

For the past few days and up until Thanksgiving, I'll be heavily involved in final preparations before putting my house on the market to sell it. Some recent pictures of my different "busy doing work looks:" (Note the new iPod Shuffle in each picture.) Which is your favorite pic? Fortunately, I've "outsourced" much of the work to a professional contractor. Even so, there is a lot of stress and physical labor on my part as I'm doing certain pieces to meet the timeline and to save some money. Work is continuing to bite me in the ass, so to speak. My blogging time is extremely limited. Thanks in advance for being patient with me. I will be sharing some purdy pictures of the finished work on the house and stories right before Thanksgiving. Jason will be here. Yay!

No Voice?

While some people would applaud the thought of me without a voice, it has happened. And opening night for my chorale's Brahms—Ein Deutsches Requiem—is tonight. I've tried extremely hard to protect my voice during our 10 or so hours of marathon rehearsals this week. However, it was not enough… Understand that we are singing almost 90 pages of music for this requiem (and another 30 or so for Lux Aeterna by Morten Lauridsen.) If the volume of music were not enough, the music is very trying! There are some high A's and B's and some very complicated syncopation and note progressions. Movement VI is 19 pages long, half of which is a quick paced fugue. Fortunately, with or without me, the sound of both the orchestra and combined choirs is extremely good. The two soloists, Kelly Anderson, baritone and You-Seong Kim, soprano are nothing short of amazing. Really, this production will be extremely professional. Article in the Cincinnati Enquirer I'm resting the voice today. Fortunately with my Boston coworker's having off today for veteran's day, I won't have to talk too much and I think I can rest my voice enough to be of value tonight.

Letter on Election Day

Dear friends in the US and Abroad, I wanted to let you know that I did my civic duty today and voted. I realize that the races in Ohio are extremely important in tipping the political scales within the US. I'm honored that I had the privilege to vote as much as I possibly could, that is to say: one time. You may ask who I voted for. Well, the answer is: I'm not going to tell you. However, I can tell you that I am SPITTING MAD AT THE WAY THE U.S. IS CURRENTLY BEING RUN. I'm sick of "staying the course" and I'm sick of the recent trend of adding religious agendas and overtones to our intented secular government. It infuriates me that due to Katrina and various wars across the world that we are borrowing money from abroad at an alarming rate. It is pathetic that, without checks and balances, there is very little accountability for mistakes made in the past 6 years. I am hoping with all my heart for a change for the betterment of my country. More selfishly, I want an end to being the butt of jokes—or worse—hated when traveling abroad. We really have a circus right now; it's embarrassing. If my wish comes true, the political pundits will paint this state blue tonight. Regards, Matt

Weekly Roundup

EXCITEMENT – I am so excited! There will be a lot of incredibly good things that are going to happen in the next 1 – 5 months. It's hard for me to not just blurt them out, but I'm not at liberty to say... Hopefully, I can share more soon! HAGGARD FAGGARD – The allegations about Rev. Ted Haggard are deliciously ironic. A very influential spiritual leader, a strong opponent to gay marriage—getting caught with a hunky, bearish and hairy male prostitute. I am grateful he did, finally admit to the allegations. HYPOCRISY – This incident is, well, funny. However, the catholic church knowingly covering up child molestation over decades was despicable. Harming innocent children: irresponsible and inexcusable. And don't get me started on how the Catholic church is encouraging the spread of AIDS in sub-Saharan Africa. Pathetic hypocrital douchebags! It really enrages me. THANK YOU, APPLE – Thank you for helping me help you make profits by providing me with a new reasonably priced iPod Shuffle (generation 2.) I love it. You can NOT tell you're even wearing it. Here's a picture of me wearing the iPod Shuffle with Mr. Patterson. There are two issues with the new iPod Shuffle. 1.) It is extremely difficult to open. With scissors, it took me several minutes to get through the thick plastic before getting to the cute mouse-coffin sized inner box. (Few worries about shrinkage!) 2.) It's so small, knowing me, I may simply misplace it.